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You are here: Home / Homeschool / Encouragement / The Pressure to be the Perfect Homeschool Mom

The Pressure to be the Perfect Homeschool Mom

February 8, 2019 by Erin Vincent 7 Comments

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Parenting is hard, folks. There, I said it. Homeschooling is hard too. Both are difficult jobs. They are marathons, not sprints. It takes years for you to see the outcomes of whatever it is you are doing right now in this moment. Years of tiny little moments adding up and filling this small person you are raising. No pressure.

This post may contain affiliate links. Please read my disclosure statement for more information.

The Pressure to be the Perfect Homeschool Mom

The Pressure to be the Perfect Homeschool Mom

I am not perfect, and I think my family can attest to that fact.

I’m not a perfect housekeeper.

My house is messy, and we have items strewn everywhere. Books, games, odds and ends for tinkering and building, there are science experiments on the kitchen counters and who knows where else…

Sometimes seven loads of laundry sit on my couch for days on end. We named him Merle!

I’ve burned a dinner or two… or ten.

Sometimes dinner doesn’t get made at all and everyone enjoys homemade cereal right out of the box!

I lose my temper and feel the weight on my shoulders of parenting and homeschooling two intensely wonderful human beings.

I want to model calm, peace, and patience for my little ones, but sometimes I have less than stellar moments.

I wrestle with depression, anxiety, and self-doubt. When those three reared their ugly heads, I really start to struggle.

I get worried.

Am I doing enough?

Will I ruin my kids?

I’m in over my head!

There is No Such Thing as Perfect, Folks!

There is pressure to do this right.

Pressure to be the perfect parent.

There is pressure to be the perfect homeschooler.

The pressure to be perfect oozes into every corner of our lives.

With social media, at everyone’s fingertips, the pressure to be perfect is even stronger. Society has a certain set of perfect standards that most try to live up to. Instagram photos look ideal and Facebook posts may convince you that everyone else has it all together.

We must always have it together, right? The perfect family, perfect wife and parent. But how can any of us actually live up to these impractical standards? There is pressure to be perfect…even though there is no such thing!

It’s totally BANANAS!!!

When we are constantly seeking homeschool perfection and looking at what everyone else is doing, then we don’t enjoy the beautiful gifts that our own homeschool offers.

The ability to slow down, going at our child’s pace, following our unique children’s interests, and developing relationships in our home are all things we miss when are busy trying to be perfect.

We All Need Compassion, Grace, and Understanding

I’m here to offer some encouragement.

We as families, as parents, as homeschoolers, as unschoolers, as classical educators, and everything in between are all doing the best we can for our children.

We are all different.

Every family dynamic is different.

Every child is different and learns in different ways.

There are different backgrounds and family traditions.

Some families want more structure, some want less. There are children that want direction, while others don’t. Some kids have learning challenges. Some children are prodigies. There are even kids that may be a mixture of the two! And just when you THINK you have everything together…your kiddos will change it up on you!

Homeschooling can be hard.

None of us are perfect. So, let’s stop comparing ourselves to others. We all struggle, fall down, lose our tempers. We all need a helping hand. We all need understanding. We all need compassion, grace, and forgiveness.

Parenting is tough folks!

Can we agree to be a little kinder to ourselves as we parent and homeschool these wonderfully quirky kiddos of ours?

Can we remember that we are enough?

Did you hear me, mama?

You are enough.

Find Your Tribe Weary Homeschool Mom

A great way to help ease you out of that perfection mindset is to find other homeschoolers who are right there in the trenches with you.

You can start by connecting with other people like yourself. Find your tribe. This could happen at co-op, church, or any number of extracurricular activities or functions that you and your kiddos may participate in.

Remember, if you can’t be authentic with people, then they not your people. Move on.

Don’t rule out an online tribe either.

Online Tribes and Communities

I’ve found some of my closest allies, cheerleaders, and homeschool friends in Facebook groups, and on blogs. Look for communities specific to your needs be they giftedness, special needs, large family homeschooling, gameschooling, etc.

When you are feeling weary and in need of encouragement I invite you to take a listen to Julie Bogart of Brave Writer. She has this Ah-Mazing ability to make you realize that you are enough and that you can, in fact, do this! Her books, Homeschool Alliance, and Podcast are filled to the brim with inspiration and wisdom.

The Homeschool Sisters Podcast is another great place to turn when homeschooling gets tough and your feeling less than perfect. These two ladies are wonderful at keeping it real while helping you find joy in the midst of homeschooling chaos. They are right there in the trenches of homeschool with you.

Also, the Simple Homeschool is a lovely blog to read when looking for simple solutions with a healthy dose of encouragement for your homeschool journey.

Sometimes you just need to get cozy with your favorite warm beverage and read or listen to some marvelous homeschool inspiration.

Perfection not required.

The Pressure to be the Perfect Homeschool Mom

If you’re feeling overwhelmed it can help to slow down. The Brave Writer philosophy suggests starting with just one thing.

Choose the thing you feel most comfortable with and do that. Then as you feel more comfortable add another resource or subject. Eventually, you’ll find yourself building layers of learning and a routine that works for you and your family.

None of Us are Perfect

I am not perfect, folks. Most days I am extremely hard on myself, but I am also loving, thoughtful, and strong.

Maybe even a bit of a Maverick.

It takes gumption, courage, and faith to do what we do.

I feel blessed to be a parent and to homeschool my children. I love being a part of the “AH HA!” moments that come out of nowhere and the magic I am able to create in my home. I love giving my children the freedom to explore and learn in their own time and in their own ways.

Things are rarely, if ever…try never…Pinterest ready.

There’s actually a high likelihood of Pinterest fails.

Like that time we tried to make magnetic slime and we ended up with black powder all in the carpet and in the upholstery… It took a week to get it all out!

But I’m there with my kids. Spending time with them. Experimenting, learning, encouraging, and connecting with them.

I realize that, while it is not best for everyone, homeschool is the best option for our family.

So, here I am…. being a perfectly imperfect homeschool mom.

What about you?

Here are some of my favorite uplifting homeschool mom resources to read:
The Pressure to be the Perfect Homeschool Mom

You may also enjoy these posts:

  • Homeschooling with Depression

  • Self-Care for the Introverted Homeschool Mom

  • Embracing Our Strengths as Introverted Homeschool Moms

  • When You Can’t Do Everything: Overcoming Homeschool Burnout

  • Scheduling for Your Homeschool When You’re Not a Schedule Kinda Girl

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Filed Under: Encouragement, Homeschool, Parenting Tagged With: Encouragement, Homeschool, homeschool mom, homeschool perfection, homeschooling, Mom, mom life, Parenting, selfcare, weary homeschool mom

About Erin Vincent

Erin is a writer, blogger, and homeschooler to two intense kids. She loves nature, farm life, good books, knitting, new pens, and hot coffee. Erin is a contributing writer for Weird Unsocialized Homeschoolers. Her work has also been featured on Simple Homeschool and Book Shark.

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Comments

  1. Mary says

    March 13, 2019 at 12:53 pm

    Needed this read today! As a working homeschool mom, I have so much on my plate every day. It can be overwhelming and easy to feel like a failure when I mess up. Also, online tribes are the best! I have been able to connect with so many wonderful homeschool moms that way!!

    Reply
    • Erin Vincent says

      March 18, 2019 at 12:11 pm

      Awe, I’m so glad you found encouragement from this! This is an overwhelming job, but totally worth it. And connecting with like-minded mamas is a tremendous help. Thank you so much for stopping by!

      Reply

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Welcome! I'm Erin, a homeschooling mom to two very intense kids. Every day I try to find what works best for me and my family. My blog is filled with information to help you explore a child led education while making meaningful connections with your children. Discover favorite read alouds, seasonal books, games, art projects, hands-on activities, and learn to just breathe through the ups and downs of life. I hope these posts will encourage you on your homeschool adventure.

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