Are you an introvert? Being introverted homeschool moms can be a struggle. But there are also strengths and encouragement in our quiet ways.
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Introverted Homeschool Moms
Motherhood is beautiful; motherhood is hard. All moms understand this paradoxical truth. Yet introverted mothers face unique challenges.” Jamie Martin, Introverted Mom: Your Guide to More Calm, Less Guilt, and Quiet Joy
I’m always looking for someplace quiet.
The constant noise and talking wear me out. Homeschooling two extroverted and intense kiddos take its toll.
I need time to recover and renew after outings. Sometimes one or two days!
That Valentine’s Day party I took the kids to that had thirty other attendees? Kids running around hopped up on cookies and chocolate. Yelling and chaos ensued.
Yeah, I needed a nap after that! At least our dog appreciated my need to re-charge.
I need alone time.
My introverted nature challenges me throughout motherhood. For years I felt guilt over how I was wired. Why did outings wear me out? Extracurriculars are exhausting, folks. I see other moms going from one activity to another and never seem to miss a beat. It’s draining just watching them!
Then I start to feel insecure. What is wrong with me?
Don’t compare your season of planting seeds with another mom’s season of harvesting them.” Jamie Martin, Introverted Mom: Your Guide to More Calm, Less Guilt, and Quiet Joy
Nothing is wrong with me. There is nothing sub-par about my abilities to handle life or homeschool my children. I am simply an introvert.
Embracing Our Strengths as Introverted Homeschool Moms
Being introverted is not something to outgrow; it is something to accept and grow into–and even cherish.” Susan Cain, Quiet: The Power of Introverts in a World That Can’t Stop Talking
I am learning to accept my introversion.
Yet, I am also a highly sensitive person. This means that on top of my introversion I am also easily overwhelmed because of a sensitive nervous system. Sights, smells, sounds, and chaos, in general, can all send me into sensory overload.
A double whammy.
The chaos of that Valentine’s day party almost did me in, folks.
It was so peopley!
Yet, everywhere I turn are articles and books on tips for dealing with the challenges of introversion. Tips for how to self-care as an introvert. These are all well and good and even welcomed, because they are important!
Exhaustion is a real challenge for introverts.
But as an introvert, I have strengths too.
Introverts recognize their unique challenges and thus learn how to prepare ahead of time. We pay attention.
This comes in handy for all things homeschool-related.
Going to have a day full of socialization and extracurriculars? Introverts prepare by having a meal in the crockpot and planned quiet time once they get back home. Then they can decompress from the days’ activities and the family is still functioning. I call this planning buffer time.
This can mean planning quiet time, nap time, or simply sticking to our routines and rhythms each day.
Sometimes it means keeping a stash of chocolate in the bathroom!
The same goes for our kids. We tend to anticipate when they need downtime or social time based on their personalities and emotions.
We are excellent at acknowledging needs beforehand and planning how to handle them accordingly.
I think listening is definitely a superpower of introverts.
Introverts tend to listen more than they talk.
This is perfect when raising or homeschooling extroverted children! Plus, we want our children to know that they can always come to us and tell us any and everything. We will listen and listening is a cornerstone in building our family relationships.
But don’t mistake our quiet for lack of knowledge.
Introverts can hold their own in a conversation especially when conversations are big, comprehensive, and detailed.
Though, afterward, we may need to have some quiet time to recuperate from all the talking. It just depends on the introvert.
As introverted moms, we take our thoughtful insights and offer them back to our families as gifts that would never exist otherwise.” Jamie Martin, Introverted Mom: Your Guide to More Calm, Less Guilt, and Quiet Joy
We, introverted mothers, are always thinking and processing the world around us. What could go wrong? What could go right? We may think of every scenario possible!
Introverts process things internally and alone as opposed to externally with loads of people.
We tend to think things through BEFORE acting. This is super helpful when homeschooling.
Brain dumps help to get all of those thought out of our heads so we can sort through them more efficiently. When my husband asks me what I’m thinking, I always say I have seventy-seven computer tabs open in my brain. Which tab is he interested in?
Introverted homeschool moms have a unique curiosity about them. Perhaps it’s because we have such vast interests. We are also usually surrounded by books and other forms of the printed word. This has huge advantages as we go along our homeschool journey.
Our children are exposed to a rich world in far-off places. One of my very favorite things in the world is reading aloud to my children. When they were smaller, they would curl up in my lap and listen with eyes sparkling.
Now that they are older, they sit next to me. But their eyes still sparkle as I read aloud with passion and excitement. I make every character unique with their own voice. I love that the books give our family a connection and afterward, conversations.
Being creative doesn’t mean introverts just like to read. There is any number of creative hobbies that introverted moms enjoy: photography, writing, gardening, sewing, art, etc.
I actually enjoy all those things.
We are also very creative when it comes to problem-solving! My kiddo isn’t grasping fractions? What creative ways can we approach this subject? Manipulatives, games, books, and videos can all be great out-of-the-box ideas!
When our quiet nature collides with our often loud role, frustration and guilt result.” Jamie Martin, Introverted Mom: Your Guide to More Calm, Less Guilt, and Quiet Joy
Introverts are known for their quiet calm exteriors. While we do enjoy the occasional adventure, we tend to be most refreshed by being alone and in our own space. It’s important to have that space to replenish ourselves. Recharging helps us to keep our tranquility. Otherwise, we become irritable and frustrated.
Our pacific temperaments make us wonderful homeschool moms as we raise and educate our little ones.
When we are calm, we can be a more emotionally generous parents to our young charges even when they are grumbling. Thus, I believe that a refreshed and calm introverted mom can provide a wonderfully gentle and inspirational homeschool environment.
An Introverted Mom
You already have every trait you need to be the best unique mother for your unique kids.” Jamie Martin, Introverted Mom: Your Guide to More Calm, Less Guilt, and Quiet Joy
The new book I’m reading, Introverted Mom: Your Guide to More Calm, Less Guilt, and Quiet Joy, has been a game-changer for me. I devoured it in a single afternoon. Each page was validation that indeed there was nothing wrong with me. Jamie Martin has such a beautiful way of expressing all the thoughts and feeling we introverted homeschool moms have felt over the years.
This book is exactly the encouragement I needed. I laughed, cried, and said “aha!” with each chapter. I love that it reminds me to let go of the mommy guilt, embrace my introversion, and to look after my needs. Rest and self-care are key, but let’s remember to celebrate our introverted strengths too.
*For my secular readers: The Introverted Mom book is quite religious, but still a great encouragement to introverts*
Are you an introvert? What do you think are your introvert strengths?
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Thank you for writing about Introverts AND homeschool Moms. I just started reading this book Introverted Mom and the first chapter had me crying and my husband asked me what was wrong. I said this lady has summed up how I feel so well and I’ve never read anything like this!
Being an Introvert in the midst of an extroverted kid is a daily challenge! I love intelligent conversation in a small group but need to re-charge when I’m overwhelmed with talking all day. Small talk and giving simple instructions bore me and make me not want to talk. I’m seeking balance and tips to recognize those times when I need to step away from talking and interaction.
Very good article. Add to the introvert, chronic pain and mind-numbing fatigue—it can be very hard. Homeschooling 4 kids is so loud. All. The. Time! But I wouldn’t trade it for the world.
This book looks like something I need to read.
Erin Vincent says
Trust me, I totally get it! I also deal with several health issues and it makes it all oh so hard. *hugs*
I could totally see us being friends, Erin! 🙂 I could really relate to this article as I’m a highly sensitive, introverted homeschooling mom too. I’ve also read all the books you suggest but Jamie’s, which is waiting on my nightstand. 😉 Thanks for the great, encouraging post!
Erin Vincent says
Hey friend! Isn’t it nice to know there are so many kindred spirits in the world and that we are not alone? I think you’ll love Jamie’s book. It’s so encouraging!
Eva / Kid Minds says
I learned a lot about myself after reading Quiet by Susan Cain. I haven’t gotten Jamie’s new book yet. Thank you for a thoughtful review! Have you seen The Highly Sensitive Person by Elaine Aron? It’s a life-changing book, in my opinion.
Laurie Sunshine says
I subscribed to your blog and discovered we both live in the same town!
Maybe someday our paths will cross! I blog, homeschool, homestead, and have 3 active boys! Seems we might have a bit in common!
Laurie Sunshine says
I’m an introvert also!
Being around a lot of people, or having to talk too much really does exhaust me as well! But I like hanging out with people close to me. I just need space when I get home.
I have one particularly intense kid, and two others. Sometimes my need for quiet shuts them out, which I don’t like.
Have to pray for balance!
Thanks for sharing!